How I Miss My Dad

I just watched an episode of “Parenthood” at Star World. It is a new serial drama which tells stories of Braverman family and the conflicts inside their family. The focus is especially at the parenting issues and how parenthood is one of the toughest work ever.

In this week episode (June 30), there is a scene in which Adam Braverman caught his daughter, Haley, was having a-facebook-official boyfriend. He was so panic and unconsciously, became over protective. He grounded his daughter and took away her cell phone.

That scene reminded me of my Dad. He used to be very hard on me, with his discipline and rules all over me. He taught me to be independent and able to do my own stuff. He wants me to do my work with minimal assistance. I used to hate his way of teaching me, because as a kid it was a torture. I thought to myself, there are no other children ever do their own work by themselves, beside me. Dad never let me got help …

But … When I grew up and stayed in Australia, I realized how big the impact of his teaching to me. I knew what to do and how to be independent. I was having no difficulties to stand up by myself and face the new situation. I remember I’ve sent a birthday card to my Dad back then. The card was full with my appreciation for his hard work and his discipline on me. Because by then, I knew that I was loved by him!

Back to the movie. On the last scene, I saw Adam’s daughter came home with her boyfriend. She wanted to introduce him to the Bravermans. It was a good scene, in which the whole family was frozen and expecting Adam’s reaction. I couldn’t help thinking of what did my Dad feel when he saw my (ex) boyfriends. One thing I know for sure, my Dad told my a family that I’m his ultimate pearl in his life. When he said that, surely I had tears. I was crying because I felt loved by him.

When a Dad finds out that his daughter is dating, he will use his lizard brain, because he doesn’t know what to do. He is so afraid of losing his daughter (Adam’s wife to their daughter)…

I miss you, Dad!

Writing is my way to share it to you.

Sixteen and Pregnant

16 and pregnant is a show in MTv that tells about the fight and the hardship of being a mom, while you yourself is only a kid. The show is now hitting the second season, but the problems are not getting easier or less complicated. The scenes of teens taking care of their own babies is just beyond words. The case would be different if you want to get married at your young age and aware enough with the consequences. But these bunch of teen girls are just teens.

The bad scene is worsened by the lack of fatherhood in those boys (who happened to make the girls pregnant). Only a few of them would be responsible of being a father and understand what fatherhood is all about. Most of the boys will walk away, ask for DNA test or still busy with their daily stuff: car modification, hang out with friends.

I’m not a judge and don’t have any rights to do that. I’m just writing down the things that I see. Outside the show, we can see many teens are getting pregnant while they still unable to take care of themselves. One girl that I knew quite well is now carrying her first baby. She is a friend of my relative. We met frequently before. In my eyes, she’s a quiet girl, who’s working hard to achieve the best at her school and work.

Her boyfriend and his family want to take the responsibility of marrying this girl and raise their baby together. But the problem is not over yet. Because she has to let her family know that she’s carrying her baby. It is now 5 weeks old and 8mm long (I wonder how cute is that).

The shock of hearing the news will be exhausting for the family and relatives. The news itsef is already a shock for the teen mom and dad.
My Dad taught me a lot about responsibility. Whatever status that you have, whatever season that you’re in … People will respect you, if only you’re such a responsible person. Responsibility is not merely for a father – as the head of the family – but also for everyone else. The kids have their responsibility as children and students. The parents have their own responsibility of taking care the kids, manage the house and looking after the whole family system. The key is to be responsible.

Back to the show …
A few of the teen couples decided to give away their babies – for the sake of the babies. Is that being responsible? In some cases, it may be yes. If those teen parents know and well-aware that they won’t be able to support their babis, then giving away the babies might be an option. Is it the right choice? No one really knows …

But there’s one thing that we all know: have a safe sex. As human being, biologically we’re created with all the sex organs, hormones and desire/lust. It doesn’t mean that we can express those needs without any consideration, because the effect will be long. Just be careful and have a safe sex .. As Nickelback said, that sex is not a question, sex is always the answer.
Be smart!

Writing is my way to share it to you.