Are You Holding The Pencil?

When I see my little nephew playing around, I can hear the voice of his mom reminds him to be careful, not to climb on the couch or stop hitting the cat with his bike. It is as if his mother builds fences around him. He needs to learn what-to-do and what-not-to-do since very young, so he will have the guidance later on.

Fortunately, the same principle can’t be applied to adults. Imagine a 20 or 30 year-old who need to be told or guided by his mother – on what to do, what to wear or what to eat. The most common excuse is how much his mother knows about him. And that’s true! But … Isn’t it time for the used-to-be little boy to grow up and learn to handle the wheels himself?

Everyone of us deserves to write our own stories. The gift of life is not merely about strolling through life day by day, but it is about writing our own stories. We are given the right to hold the pencil in our hands and start drawing, sketching and writing the stories. We are given with the voices, to be told, to be heard. We are blessed.

But how many of us let others hold the pencil for us? It can be found in many different forms – staying in the same job for years even though we hate it so much, living with others who hurt us most of the time and many more. We build a mental block that we have no choice. We believe that it is meant to be – that we don’t have control over our lives.

We do. We have the options, we have the control – as long as we want to hold on to the pencil that has given to us. It wont be easy, because we will hear so many false voices accusing us, disagree with us and simply put us down. Why? Because the way they hold their pencils are different compare to ours. They can’t accept the differences, because they are afraid it will hurt them. They are afraid to change, to adjust. And they project their fear to us. They try to control our pencils and lead it according to their will.

My question is how long will you be able to stay? As long your heart beats? As long as you can make others happy?

You only live once, and sometimes that’s all you need. Take that pencil back to your hands and start writing. No matter how bad your handwriting might be, it is yours truly. And no matter how great the cursive of others, they don’t belong to you.


Picture is taken from @motivationalpage

I Believe in You

I believe that everyone needs someone else to believe in them.

Imagine a young child who is started to walk on his two feet. The coldness of the tiles and the surge of nervousness might intrude into his mind at the same time. He is thinking about the importance of stepping his first steps. In the midst of his consideration, he can see his parents are smiling at him. Clapping their hands, calling his name and invite him to walk across toward them. He can see that his short walk will reward him with some hugs and smiles. He knows that his parents believe in him – that he can overcome his nervousness and walk! And surely, he can do it.

After a while, he will notice that his walks are not yet steady, he sometimes fall or unable to avoid his teddy bear on the floor. He stumble every now and then – and he can feel the same surge of nervousness running through him again. But, he still sees his parents waving at him – ask him to get up and walk again. He knows that his parents believe in him and it makes him get up and walk again. His process of getting up again is a proof that this young child believe in himself, because his parents believe in him.

Earlier today (Feb 3, 2012) I had an interview with JJFm radio. They want me to give my opinion about the rising number of children who run away from their homes. This phenomenon is another example of how bad the impact when family members no longer able to believe in each other – parents to children, among siblings, or children to parents. It is sad to know that in our daily life we can see people stray away from their future or capacity – just because no one believe in them.

I was about to drop the offer on interview because they only gave me 15-30 minutes to get ready. I was frightened that I would not be able to give my best shot. I didn’t believe in myself – but someone else did. I had a meeting with a friend when the radio called me up. He said that I need to close all the books in my head and use my heart to talk, because I can do it. He believed in me – so that I finally regain the belief of believing in myself.

We can do one thing today and the next days, pat someone on their back and say it firmly that you believe in them to do their best. You will be surprised how powerful the word of “I believe in you”.