The Dead Clock

I saw at my wall clock and I found out that the batteries were empty, so the arms were not moving. Yes, it was a dead clock.

That dead clock reminds me of a 42-year-old woman whom I know from long time ago. She had gone through hard times when she was a child. Her parents bankrupt and they had to leave Taiwan and move to another country. She had to adjust to her new life in a new environment. And at that time, she did pretty well.

The problems came when her family found out that she was not able to forget and forgive all the memories that had been past. She could remember all the tiny details on certain events, in which something happened to her/her family. She would be able to retell the stories, including the date, time, the surroundings or the after events … all in details. She had that vivid pictures of those happenings in her life. And that’s a problem…

Now, she still retell the stories that had happened more than 30 years ago. Like this one story about an incident in 1976, in which her friend (her parents’ son) was accidentally broke one of her toys. Her mom threw that broken toy straightaway, because she thought that the broken toy was useless. But this girl was upset with her mom’s decision. She still had that hatred toward her mom until now. The most interesting action was taken by her last 2008, when she bought the same toy, broke the toy herself, took a picture of that broken toy … and at last sent that picture to her parents’ friend in Taiwan! Even after 32 years of living her life, she was not willing to let it go, to let a boy go without giving him a punishment, by sending the fake evident to his parents.

When I heard that story from her, I was frozen! I did not know what to do. So, I asked her whether she got reply from her friend’s parents, and she said No. Then I asked one more question, whether she felt embarassed of doing so, because it had happened 32 years ago and the incident was just a small action done by a young boy. She said that she did not feel embarassed by what she had done, because for her the most important thing is the satisfaction of telling that boy’s parents of what he had done. I don’t think she has the understanding regarding time frame in this life …

Life itself is a moving wheel. It will never stop and always bring us ups and downs. This woman had chosen a path in which she is staying still with her memories and her hatred toward others who hurt her. She would not be able to forgive those people, unless they could bring back everything that she had lost… she said that to me hundred times.

If only someone would be able to replace the batteries inside of her, just like I did with my clock… maybe she would be able to think forward and do something better for her future.

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