Reading People in A Deep Sea

It’s not like you read people in a real deep sea. It’s just a metaphor. For me, an effort to read people is like swimming into a deep sea. Imagine a deep blue sea in your mind now, so you can get the process that I am going through. If it’s too hard for you, get the encyclopaedia from your shelf and open the page on sea levels.

The first time your feet touch the sea surface, you can feel the sensation. Something different is touching your skin. That’s how it feels when we meet a new people for the first time. We can feel something different is showing off from that person, something that you sense unique or attractive. From that point, you can’t really ‘see’ that person. Obviously, you can see the performances, the appearances … and that’s all. It’s the same when you are at that sea level. Everything look blue, calm and beautiful.


Going deeper … it’s when you start to know that person well. Not really well though, but at least you started to notice his/her behaviors. You may get the slightest thought of what kind a person is that person. You may notice his/her habits: favorite food & beverage, favorite color, pulling hair, biting nails, or any visible actions. Remember, only the visible actions. It’s the same as if you see the beautiful fish are swimming in front of your eyes. So dazzling, colorful and yet somehow, you know it’s just the surface.

If you dig deeper into someone’s soul, it’s going to be a bit (and bits) harder that before. People tend to wear masks (even though they say that they Don’t). It’s very natural and sometimes happen unconsciously. Why do they wear masks? It’s a feeling of being afraid to be rejected. Very natural, right? In this point, you can see yourself swimming in a deeper level, where the sunlight is not so bright anymore. You started to see the shadows that you did not see before. You started to realize that the fish are not as nice as before. They are getting bigger and scary. In this level, the fish are not ‘designed’ to be seen, not as the fish in the surface. They are stronger and fierce, because the situation is not safe anymore. They may get attacked by bigger fish… So, masks = scarier? You figure it out.


When you reach the level of darkness and chill water, you may want to get out. Yes, you can get out with a bigger effort compare to the previous moment of getting in. The curiosity that we have usually bring us into the deeper level of someone’s soul. We will figure out his/her nasty habits (we all have such habits), the past and gravest mistake.

It always takes time to get to know someone better. It’s always about time. So, whenever you want to get to know someone very well, take your time. Imagine that you are swimming in a deep blue sea. Wear your oxygen mask and other equipment. Better be prepared than drown yourself away.

Enjoy the trip!

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